Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Random Thoughts.....


I've been subbing per-diem the past few days and have no computer access at school - and precious little time when I get home these days. I hate being so busy all the time. And all this clutter around my house as we remodel is...well...getting to me! I'm trying really hard to be "content in all circumstances"but it sure is hard to not have some wistful days where I dream about the new house and everything in its place. Of course...with my messy hubby - that may never happen. But one can dream....


I haven't heard anything on the job yet. They said I'd hear in 2 weeks. It's been 5 days. I'm restless and starting to feel doubtful. If I was the perfect candidate - wouldn't they have called me by now? Sometimes I can drive myself crazy worrying about things I can't control. It's just that I really, REALLY need this job. The health insurance we pay out of our own pocket now is killing us. I'm wondering how I'm going to be able to pay my taxes that are due at the end of the month. And so of course - the stress is playing havoc with my eating.


It doesn't help that the hubby now is making comments about my weight. I think he believes he's pointing something out to me that I don''t already know. Gee, thanks honey...didn't realize I was fat. I've tried to tell him that his "gentle" reminders do more harm than good. I want to lose weight for ME. Not him or anyone else. He doesn't get it. Men always want to fix things. He knows I'm trying and thinks he's helping. If you're reading this dear - you are NOT helping.


Okay - that's off my chest. Next topic.


There has been a thread of commonality on many of the blogs I read. People saying they are thinking of giving up their blogs. That there's only so much you can write about weight loss before you start to run dry. And I'll admit - I've felt it too lately. Life has been busier - and I read more blogs regularly than I used to (especially since the Healthy You Challenge)- which means less time myself to write. But I really don't want to see people just disappear into cyberspace. There is a kindred spirit here that makes me feel connected to a lot of you and I don't want to see you leave. I personally don't care if every post I read is about weight loss. I like just reading about what's going on in your lives too! Even if you post only once a week - that's fine with me. As long as we stay connected. I want to be there when a lot of you cross the finish line and run that marathon - or reach your goal weight - or do whatever it is that you're trying to do!


It's as if we are all on this long journey - and we've picked up fellow travelers along the way. Some fall away and others remain. While the destination is always foremost in our mind's eye - traveling together is a just as important part of the process. I've enjoyed my trek so far with you guys. Let's hang in there okay? I don't do well when I travel alone.

8 comments:

Honi said...

first good luck with the job.. secondly I really agree with the blog issues that I have seen lately too.. and I love your response.. I dont care if they post about weight loss or not.. just post about what is going on.. its all part of the samw picture.. I think...

Diana Swallow said...

I think HYC is a blessing and a curse all at the same time. I'm happy so many people are getting something from it but I hate that it takes up so much time for me and everyone else. There must be a better way.

Grumpy Chair said...

As one of those "I'm not feeling motivated to blog any more" people, I really do appreciate your comment this morning.

I have been doing this almost 2 years and I have had one break. So next week we will be away and I will get said needed break!

I had sort of an "aha" moment yesterday morning in the shower and it made me rethink the whole giving up blogging thing.

One thing that helped me was deleting several of the blogs in my google reader that were not currently active. And as I was unsubscribing to them, I felt they had probably gone back to their unhealthy lifestyles and given up. I didn't want to be one of those people.

Thank you for this post. I hope others read it too.

Heather said...

totally get that! I used to have time to write these long reflective pieces or something real deep, and now all I seem to post is what Ive lost or gained, what Ive done for exercise, etc. which may not be so interesting for others, but hey, I started this blog for ME. so its more for accountability for me than it is trying to be entertaining. and I think thats what people feel they have to be.

Hanlie said...

That's very true - we don't do well when we travel alone... I need every comment and show of support I get! I need to write and express myself.

Anonymous said...

Hey. I just wanted to leave a note for you. Thank you so much for wanting to keep an eye on me even though I decided to go private with my blog - I was very surprised to see the response that I got from this announcement - but it just means so much more to know who is reading me - and I will return the favor for sure. I do need to recommit myself to my blog and to this weight loss journey - and am so happy to have you reading. Take care!!

Hugs from SK CANADA! Christine

TitanThirteen said...

Aawww [[hugs]] I wish we lived closer, then i smack your husband around a bit and you and i would have marvolous coffee together, and often!
I won't stop blogging untill i've lost all my weight. You can't get rid of me, i'm like a cling-on lol

RunningNan said...

I don't think I would ever completely give up. It's a nice outlet to express what you are thinking to everyone but your closest family and friends. I don't have to worry about censoring myself at all on here.

I totally agree with you on the control thing. I have a hard time with that as well. If a week and 2 days go by, call them. Show them you want it! Good luck!