Friday, December 7, 2007

Will Someone Whack Me Upside the Head Please?

Tonight I hit my second Christmas party of the season. I tried my black dress slacks on - the really nice ones made of the fine material that I only wear to parties. I could zip them still...but they were snug. Yep. Thanksgiving did me in. I feel a tad bloated now and well...rather fat.

It's my own fault. I do stupid things that I know will sabotage my efforts. Like this morning. Daughter was getting her phone hooked up and couldn't be there when the phone company came. So I volunteered to sit there for 4 an apartment that has no living room furniture yet. As I'm driving there I remember that she doesn't have a coffee maker. Egads! I need to have a cup of coffee while I'm waiting there! It was only 7:45 as I was driving over. So I zip through the McDonald's right by her place and decide (now here's the stupid part and I knew as I was speaking the words that I was going to be sorry) to get a breakfast to go with the coffee. The sausage biscuit with egg. Which comes with home fries. Of course.

It tasted heavenly. But as soon as I washed that last bite down with a swig of coffee - I felt like crap. I'm a sucker for anything crispy, crunchy, fried and loaded with carbs. Eating that stuff is a like a fix for me. I wish I hated carbs. I wish I loved fruit. I force myself to eat it. I do love veggies...thank goodness for that or I'd really be in trouble.

So tonight will be a challenge. There will be a ton of fancy hors' douvres and since this is our big family bash - all the cousins get together (there will be about 30 of us) the women will all hang out where they ALWAYS do every year. Hovering over the food table. I know I'll be right there with them. No matter what kind of resolve I may have right now - that's where I'll end up.

The only good thing is that because of all my blogging buddies ~ I'm still hanging in there. Long before this I would've thrown in the towel and decided that I was meant to be fat and I may as well get used to it. (I used to do that every few months.) But since I've been blogging - 10 months now - I haven't. Not once. Sure I've slipped a lot. But I've always gotten back up and put one foot in front of the other. It's a slow and painful trek. But one I'm determined to make no matter what.

1 comment:

Lauren said...

you really can do this. I was feeling really stressed about the bad food choices I've been making but I still came in with a loss and I'm really grateful for it. Remember you don't have to start again tomorrow, youc an start again RIGHT NOW. and you will do amazing things.