Monday, November 17, 2008

Working on my Attitude....


Gosh...I can remember when I'd trek off to the library just to make sure I blogged each day and if I missed a day I felt so...unconnected. Lately I've been so busy that it's just not on my priority list. I have seen that happen in blogland. Blogs come and go.....sometimes get resurrected and then slowly fade away into cyber space.

I'm not ready to do that yet. Even though my sporadic posts may seem to indicate otherwise. It's just that my life at this point is hectic to say the least. And I'm trying very hard to just let go and relax and not worry about what doesn't matter. Like hosting Thanksgiving here for the In-law's with most of my furniture gone. And serving dinner in our empty living room (that has been serving as "workshop central" as we've been remodeling here to get our house ready to sell.) Which means the rug that will hopefully be replaced before next Thursday (but probably won't) is spattered with paint, ground in sawdust and dirt! And the good dishes are in storage. And I have one couch and one love seat in the already small family room to take care of 15 people while we wait for dinner.

And then then there's Christmas. The house could and should've been done by then. But alas I'm married to a procrastinator that hems and haws before each decision. I keep saying "Get the drywall man on the books so when we're ready he is too!" But has hubby done that? Nooooo. He keeps putting off the essentials for things that are not on top of the priority list. Now we're ready and the drywall guy isn't.

I keep telling him "We HAVE to order those kitchen cabinets so they'll be here in time." But he wants to keep looking just in case there's a better deal. I'm all for better deals but we've been looking since June!

Okay. I'm not truly complaining here. I've got much to be thankful for and I'm going to focus on that. If the inevitable happens and we have to do Christmas here - there will just be a little tree with minimal decorations. Most of my stuff is packed and ready to move so it won't be the magical wonderland that I always try so hard to create each year. (Got that from my mom!)

It'll be different. But who knows. Maybe it will be the Christmas we always remember. That Christmas the year of the great move! Or maybe not.

But I've somewhat readjusted my attitude and keep repeating the mantra my late husband always clung to. Accept or change - but don't complain. I'm trying to keep my focus on God and what the season truly means. I'm praying for grace daily to accept my circumstances and still have a grateful heart. As we've been collecting to fill Thanksgiving baskets to give to the poor in our area - I'm remembering how having a dirty rug or few decorations is the least of their worries. And should be the least of mine too.

Lest I sound too Saintly - believe me - I struggle. Keeping one's eyes off of one's self isn't always easy. We weren't wired that way. So I'm looking to the Master Electrician to do some re-routing in this heart of mine. So this holiday season...I can see the true light.

9 comments:

grammy said...

Yikes girl, you are going to make yourself crazy here. Think of it this way...you have an excuse to have a frumpy rug and lack of furniture. Go with it. Everyone knows why. I'm not sure why someone else hasn't voluntered??? All the men need is a TV. Use folding chairs. About Xmas..I like the idea of a little Charlie Brown tree. Fun for one year anyway. My sister is like you with the magic wonderland. It really kills you in the long run. I always went the other direction and enjoyed simple! I am glad you got to post. Sorry you are in such a pickle. Let go and relax if you can. I had one thing in mind for the holidays and then just last night found out six of my in-laws and several kids will be here. At least 2 are spending a week here. I don't love it, but I don't hate it either. I have ajusted my attitude and will just enjoy. (o: That sounded way to saintly. Not! I did plenty of belly aching before I adjusted. lol God keeps working on me. (o: I am going to New york for a week in Dec. Now that makes me smile.

RunningNan said...

I know that you'll definitely have a Thanksgiving to remember. It all seems so far away, but once it's all done, it will be a distant memory!

Scale Junkie said...

Don't let it stress you. It is what it is and eventually it will all be back together again. But yeah, your house has been "a work in progress" for a while now...hopefully next year it will be but a memory.

new*me said...

focus on the people and the rest will be okay!

Xtrainer said...

You may have already read it since it's a popular book, but I would suggest reading Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. It's a very compelling book and really helps to put things in perspective for those in tough times.

Ruth said...

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Ruth

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Pattie said...

Great post, Lora. It's so easy to focus on what's wrong instead of what's right, isn’t it? I love your late hubby's saying about complaining. That's perfect!

I know you’re working on doing this, but remember: the holidays are about having your family around you - not about the decorations or the food, or even the furniture (although having a seat for each one of them would be nice!)

I think this will turn out to be a holiday season you'll always remember!

JC said...

Wonderful post. Stay plugged in to the Master and everything will work out as it should. Have a great weekend.

Manuela said...

First of all, I hope that we don't lose you altogether! I enjoy your posts and photos too much (when I get the chance)

I totally know what you mean about being busy and that takes priority over blogging any day. Stop by every now and then to keep us informed. We all want to see pictures of the house when it's finished!

Grade 4 is fun so far--only 2 days but I've learned a lot. This week I'll be teaching the science lesson; they are starting on habitats. It's such a lot of work!!!